A Graceful Mess Read online

  Oh, God. He doesn’t like it. He knows this is my first time and thinks I’m no good at it.

  I can’t look up, scared to see the disappointment in his eyes. I open my mouth and pull his penis out of it and lay it sideways over on his thigh, then slowly start to back up, dragging a pillow up with me to cover my body.

  “What’s wrong sweetheart?”

  He should know.

  Hello? I suck at giving head.

  “Parker, I know I’m no good at that. It’s okay, you don’t have to tell me. If you want I can just get dressed and you can take me home.”

  “Home?”

  I look towards the door in embarrassment. Without warning he reaches up and grabs my arm, pulling my body on top of his. His penis is under my pelvis. I feel it twitch and for a brief moment wonder if I am crushing it.

  “Don’t you dare doubt yourself. Your lips around my cock feels like a dream. One I have been having for weeks. Do you feel that? Did you see it? Did you see how fucking horny I am? It’s hard as a rock. Do you know why?” I shake my head. He points his index finger into my chest gently as I lie on top of him.

  “You. You make me that hard. Your lips, your sweet little tits hanging out, that wet little clit I can’t wait to taste. All of that turns me on. Now you had your turn. I touched you; do you want to touch me some more?”

  I guess it felt better than I thought.

  His words make me want to continue. I want to show him how good I can make him feel, so I scoot back and bend in front of him again. My hand picks up his shaft again. I don’t know if it is possible, but he feels harder. There is even a thick vein that is sticking up. I lower my head and begin where I left off. The taste of the clear, nasty stuff coming from his hole makes my nose crinkle. It doesn’t taste that bad, but it’s bad enough. My hand and my mouth join forces and come up with a good rhythm. One sucks and the other strokes, but I can do more, so I lower my head farther down his shaft. His thickness fills my jaws, as my lips stretch around him to accommodate his size. I go lower, and lower, and lower. It’s like a game. I want to see how much I can take in every time. My throat makes a choking sound; it sounds like water splashing around. I think the sound excites him because his erection starts to move. It pulsates in my hand as my mouth continues to choke on it.

  “Yeah…fuck, sweetheart. That’s it…” he grunts. “Take as much as you can…Ahh.”

  His verbal praise makes me go faster. The slobber from my mouth gives my hand even more lubrication to move at a faster rate. My hand is shaped like the letter C, as it pumps up and down. His body tenses and shakes, and then his thigh muscles contract. My forearm is resting on his leg, and I can feel his muscles tighten as his toes curl.

  Throwing his head back, he mumbles, “I’m going to come. Oh shit, Grace. Fuck. Let me in your mouth.”

  I don’t move away, but keep up my own personal rhythm. One of his hands grabs a fistful of my hair and pushes my head down towards the base of his penis. I take in more than before. I didn’t think it was possible, considering his length, but my mouth and throat accept it. Suddenly I feel warmth. The feeling is strange as a thick substance fills my mouth. His penis taps against my tongue as his hand frees itself from my hair and hovers over my hand. He cups my hand and slowly moves it up. More semen fills my mouth as we push all of it out with our hands. I swallow. I’m not sure if I should have, but I don’t know what to do with it.

  “Did you just swallow my nut?” He looks shocked as he asks.

  Sitting up in his bed and wiping the corner of my mouth, I say, “Yeah…”

  “That is so fucking sexy. Come here, it’s your turn.” He sits up and pushes my stomach back with one hand and braces the other on my spine. Leaning both of our bodies backwards he lays me on the mattress. In a swift motion he is in between my legs. He doesn’t rip my underwear this time. Instead he uses one thumb to push them to the side. I can feel his hot breath and then I don’t know what happens, but my back is arched and my breathing becomes erratic. His mouth, his lips and tongue feel so good sliding up and down. Sucking on parts of me I didn’t know could be sucked. His teeth bite at the sides of my folds as he brings his other hand up and gently slaps my core.

  “Ahh…” my body shivers.

  “You like that?” He knows the answer. My pelvis lifting up towards his face as he buries his mouth in my sweet-spot answers his question.

  “Oh. My. God. Parker. Oh….” I feel like I am going to burst. Like literally fall apart. My body shakes and then my toes curl just like his did. This is the best feeling in the entire world. Not only does it feel good, but the intimate nature of the act turns me on just as much. I feel his finger enter me. He pumps it in and out, faster and faster, causing my body tense. I can feel myself building. The desire to let go has never been stronger. Even by my own hand behind closed doors, it has never been this intense.

  “Open your eyes, Grace, and come.”

  “Oh…oh…yeah…” I can’t take it. My body shakes erratically for a few seconds and then I fall flat against the mattress. Winded and numb.

  That was the best orgasm of my entire life.

  The lights flicker on as both of our heads collapse against the bed. The sounds of our uneven breathing remind me of a dog panting. All of a sudden I feel something wet on my hand. Looking over, I see Josie sitting with her mouth hung open. Either she must be out of water, or we aren’t the only ones who are hot. The air conditioning kicks on as Josie starts to bark.

  “I’ll be right back,” I say while jumping up and sliding my basketball shorts on, without boxers. “Don’t move, and stay naked!”

  Laughing as I walk, Josie brushes by me and runs to the back door. Opening the sliding door, I can tell the sky is starting to clear. The clock on the wall says it’s six. Grace never said what time she had to be back for her birthday celebration, but I am hoping we have a few more hours together. Glancing into the open field I call a backyard, Josie does her business and then runs back to the door where I am standing. Her paws are wet and muddy. Normally I would dry them off, but I’m in too much of a hurry to get back in bed. Grabbing a treat, I toss it on the floor and sprint back to my bedroom.

  Opening the door, I can tell Grace is in the same position. She listens really well. My hands frantically pull down my shorts and throw them onto the floor as I slide back in bed next to her sexy body. My left arm slides under her neck, and my body turns to its side, making it easy to look into her eyes.

  “Getting comfy now, are ya?” A smile spreads across her face. Little does she know I would stay in this position forever, peering into those bright, blue eyes if she would let me. Holding people captive is frowned upon, but I bet I could make a pretty convincing case and lure her into never leaving if I needed too.

  “Yes, ma’am, I am. How about that? Are you comfortable?”

  “Surprisingly, yes.”

  Raising one of my eyebrows, I ask, “And what’s that supposed to mean?”

  “Well…it means that I am comfortable enough to be lying in your arms naked. That surprises me. That’s all I meant by that.”

  Using my nose to caress her cheek, she looks over and into my eyes. I swear they are the most pure set of eyes I have looked into. Her words remind me of that asshole she was talking about earlier. I don’t want to overstep my boundaries by asking so I bite my tongue, but make a mental note to do some research when I get back to the office.

  “Well, I’m glad you’re comfortable. So tell me something about yourself.”

  “Umm, like what? You know my name, where I live, that I graduated college. What else is there to know?”

  “Oh, come on. Tell me something no one else knows.” I scoot closer to her body. The air is on now, but the room is still hot. We lay next to each other on top of the comforter.

  “Hmm…okay. Let me think about it. Something no one else knows…” She closes her eyes and inhales.

  Oh shit, how deep is she going with this?

  “My mom got me a
cat for Christmas one year,” she giggles, “And I hated that thing! I can’t even lie. Pretzel was his name, and he was a jerk. He never let me hold him or pet him, and he always ran from me. So one night, when my parents were in bed, I opened the back door and kicked the cat out. In the morning my mom and dad hung missing signs all around the neighborhood. To this day, no one knows what I did.”

  “Wow, I didn’t peg you for a rebel.”

  “There’s a lot about me you don’t know, Parker.” She grins this mischievous grin. If I wasn’t already intrigued, I would be now.

  “Okay. Your turn” Flipping on her side so we are now face to face, she holds her head up with her elbow and places her other hand on my bicep.

  “All right, I’ll play. What do you want to know?”

  “How many girls have you slept with?”

  Whoa. Where did that come from?

  Noticing my hesitation she asks, “Okay, that was a bit unfair. Let’s try this again. Have you ever been in love?”

  I should have known playing twenty questions with a female is never a good idea. They get all sappy and want a heart to heart. Oddly, I don’t mind sharing, not now and not ever as long as it is Grace asking the questions.

  “Yeah.” Let’s leave it short and sweet.

  “And…? Do I have to pull information out of you?

  “Do you want the long version or the short?”

  “Long, but I’m okay with the short, for now.”

  “Her name was Kristy. We were college sweethearts. She cheated. I caught her, we broke up.”

  “Nothing is ever that easy. There has to be more to the story.”

  “That’s the short version. Now it’s my turn. Have you ever been in love?” Feeling like a thirteen-year-old boy who just hit puberty, I lay nervously fidgeting with my hands waiting for her answer. Silence fills the air for what seems like hours, although it has only been a couple of seconds.

  “I thought I was in love, but I wasn’t. Not in the end. A man who you love and who claims to love you back would never betray you, or hurt you. Not in the way he hurt me at least. It wasn’t love, so no, Parker, I have never been in love.” My chest feels tight, and I immediately regret asking.

  Moving on.

  “Favorite color?”

  “Purple, you?”

  “Black. Favorite type of music?”

  “I like a lot of different genres. When I was younger I took dance classes, so I like to listen to a lot of different types. I guess it just depends on what type of mood I’m in.”

  Shaking my head I say, “Me too. In the gym I like to listen to rap. A little 2Pac or Lil Wayne. But sometimes at the office I listen to classical. I agree; it just depends on my mood, but most of the time I am playing country or something like Ryan Bingham in the truck.”

  “That’s cool. So how often do you work out?”

  “About five times a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less. Opening my own gym has been a dream of mine for as long as I can remember.”

  “Oh, so what do you do?”

  Shit.

  “I, umm, work with my father. He has a small business, so I help him run it.”

  “Cool. I understand small business life. My father and mother own one too. That little hotel right off of the freeway, my family owns it. We lived in Maine during my childhood, but then my dad’s corporate job transferred him here my freshman year of high school. He and my mom were fighting all the time, and he was never home. Then my mom got pregnant with the twins, and, well, I guess my dad had a change of heart. So he bought the place at an auction and resigned from his corporate job. We spent an entire summer fixing it up, and now it’s how they earn a living. Running the hotel hasn’t been easy for them, and financially they have invested everything, but they seem much happier than they were in Maine.”

  “You’re shitting me. I’ve picked Carson up from there many mornings.”

  “It’s a small world, Parker.” Leaning her head on my arm, I bend down and kiss her forehead. The genuineness of her statement and its truth makes me feel like a criminal hiding a deep dark secret. In reality, I am. She just doesn’t know how small of a world it is yet.

  We spend the next hour lying in each other’s arms. Kissing, talking, and kissing again. I don’t think I have been so chatty and openly talked about myself – ever. He makes it easy though. Sort of like breathing, you don’t think about it, your body just kind of does it on its own. That’s how I feel talking to Parker. It’s like my mouth opens and all of these crazy things come out. Things Maci doesn’t even know. Things about my past, living in Maine, the fact that I have horrible dreams, and have had the same recurring one since the first time I laid eyes on Parker.

  “I don’t know where I am, but I’m young, like not much older than six or so I would say. I’m in a huge brick house, and it’s storming outside. I’m scared and the only thing keeping me safe is a little stuffed rabbit. In the dream I’m crying, but I don’t know why.”

  “Damn. Have you ever told anyone that?”

  “No,” I whisper. He leans down and grabs my head, placing one hand on each cheek, and kisses my forehead. That wasn’t the first time he did that today, and I hope not the last.

  The sound of buzzing in the distance interrupts the moment. “That’s my phone.”

  “Ignore it.” He wraps his arms around me and pulls my body on top of his. We are still naked. It feels nice, like we live in one of those strange nudist places where people walk around and even grocery shop while naked. That’s a little extreme, but I don’t mind being nude in the same bed with Parker. He hasn’t tried to do anything since, well, after our oral adventure. A few times things have gotten a little heated during our twenty questions game, but it hasn’t led us anywhere. I think we both actually enjoy being with one another, and the sex is a bonus. As long as the conversation holds, I don’t mind just being held in his arms.

  “I wish I could, but I know it’s getting late. It’s my birthday, remember? We’re going out. Hey, you should join us.” Darting up from his bed, I jump up and run to grab my phone from the living room. I bend to pick up my phone out of my bag as the front door swings open. Carson is holding a backpack and a jug of water, staring wide-eyed from the doorframe. We hold each other’s gaze; his eyes don’t leave mine. Although my hands are covering my breasts and lady parts, I still feel exposed.

  “Grace?” Parker’s voice echoes off of the walls. No one moves or talks. This is the most awkward situation I have ever been in. It feels like a scene straight from one of those movies, where the girl spends the night in a frat house and then does the walk of shame in the morning. I am that girl right now. Although I am not ashamed, it still feels like I’ve been caught red-handed with my hand in the cookie jar. I know there is nothing to be ashamed of, but this is still weird standing in front of him in my birthday suit. How fitting, today of all days.

  “Hi.” I shudder in embarrassment. Carson tilts his head back slightly in one of those manly hellos guys do to one another, but no words leave his mouth. Great, he is mad.

  “Grace, is someone here?” I hear footsteps and then Parker emerges from the hallway. He is standing in all of his glory. This has officially become a nightmare.

  “Bro, what are you doing here?” Parker asks Carson. He doesn’t move his hand or anything to cover his penis that is just hanging out there, like he doesn’t have a care in the world. The sight makes me blush, and I hope no one notices.

  “Whoa, dude, cover that shit up. No one wants to see your junk!”

  “Whoa, dude, this is my house,” Parker mimics Carson’s tone. “If you don’t want to see it, get out.”

  Slowly backing away from the action, I make it to the dark hallway before anyone notices, and run backwards to the bedroom, quietly shutting the door behind me. Dropping to my knees, I cover my mouth with my hand trying to hide the laughter that is bellowing from my lungs. How embarrassing! The testosterone in the living room is a little overwhelming. Noticing I have my phone hel
d tightly in my hand, I open it and see a missed call and text from Maci.

  Hey girlie. I know Karen and I pissed you off earlier, I’m sorry! Where are you? You stormed off and then were nowhere to be found. Call me or get your ass home. Despite today, we are still going out! Love you, boo.

  I hit reply before I have a chance to collect my thoughts. Today has just taken me on a rollercoaster of emotions. Holding my phone with both hands, I use my thumbs to type.

  You wouldn’t believe where I am if I told you, but…because I know you will ask, I will tell you.

  Turning my phone around and hitting the camera button. I take a quick shot of myself, from my collarbones up, then press send. My phone rings in my hand seconds later. I don’t want Parker or Carson to hear me, so I crawl across the floor into a small open door, the closet. Sitting on the floor I press the green button and answer the call.

  “Hey,” I whisper into the receiver.

  “Where are you and why are you whispering? I can hardly hear you.”

  “I’m in Parker’s closet.” I try to muffle my laughter.

  “What the heck are you doing in there? Wait, why are you there? How did you get there?”

  I start from the beginning and tell her everything, all the way up to why I am naked sitting on the floor of a dark closet.

  “Well, this is dumb! You’re supposed to be here getting ready. I don’t care what you say or what kind of mood you’re in, we are going to Shameless and we are going to celebrate your birthday!”

  Maci’s whining causes me to roll my eyes. Using the long sleeve of a sweatshirt to help pull myself off the floor, I say, “I don’t know what is taking them so long, but you’re right. I know. Okay, let me get dressed and I’ll go out there and ask Parker to bring me home. Love you too. Bye.” Gathering my clothes, I get dressed and brush my fingers through my hair. I know it’s still a mess, but at least it should be somewhat presentable. Walking out of the room, I notice the living room is quiet, but the front door is open. Headlights are radiating off of the glass door separating me from the outside. I grab my purse that’s still wet from being dropped in the puddle, slide my sandals on, and then walk out onto the porch. Parker is now wearing another pair of basketball shorts and is barefoot standing in his driveway. Carson is sitting in the parked car. Walking up beside Parker, I bend down into the window.