In the Lyrics Read online

  Choosing to ignore her comment, I hope to make a point that I’m not falling victim to her games. Maybe she is one of those play-hard-to-get type girls. I’m not sure, but nonetheless while she is attractive and sings like an angel, I didn’t come here to find love. I came here to make my dreams come true. On the other hand, I did wake up with a stiffy just from the idea that she was sleeping in such close proximity. My head silently spins from the competing thoughts running rampant in my brain as she leans over the counter and places a plate stacked high with pancakes in front of me. My nostrils flare as I take a deep breath. I don’t know if it’s the scent of her glossy lips or the syrup that smells sweeter.

  A few strands of hair fall over her eye, blocking her line of vision. She reaches to brush them away as the sight of a silver ring grabs my attention. It’s a purity ring. I recognize it immediately because a lot of girls back home have them. While most of them only wear them to appease their families, I doubt Hensley is a fake. A fake virgin – how lame does that sound? My throat feels dry. Hensley is a virgin. So far she hasn’t let off anything that would make me think that. She is snarky and foul mouthed, at least that’s what I’ve gathered from the time I’ve known her. Which hasn’t even been twenty-four hours yet. But a virgin? I’m shocked, to say the least. After all, if it’s not her looks that would entice a man, it’d be her standoffish attitude. I mean, everyone wants what they can’t have, but yet there seems to be something more to her. Something deeper.

  Hensley is like a jigsaw puzzle. Just from looking at the box on the outside, it appears easy. You think, “I could put this together in no time,” when really, once you open the box and take a glance inside, there are so many tiny pieces. The reality is the little project you thought would take a mere hour to complete is way more complex than you realized. The only problem is I’m normally not a patient person, but with Hensley I could see myself sitting for hours, maneuvering her pieces, until they fit in place and the picture is complete. Her being a virgin is just a small piece of the puzzle. It’s the bigger picture I just don’t see yet, the reasons behind her decision to stay pure. Not that I’m not ecstatic. It’s every man’s dream to be with a virgin. Not in the sexual innuendos way, but in the way that she saved herself for so long and is giving you that gift. I want to be the one to unwrap her gift. I want her to give it to me, and yet I barely even know her.

  She doesn’t notice my sudden change in demeanor as I tilt my body to adjust myself in my pants. I’m only a man – a Southern man with a beautiful Southern woman standing in front of me, a gorgeous, talented one at that. Come on, you can’t blame my wandering mind for that one.

  “I’m not trying to be rude. I know why you came here. My dream’s to make it big someday too. I’ll try to lighten up on you.”

  “Yeah, sounds good.” My voice sounds like I’m a thirteen-year old boy who just hit puberty as it cracks from me trying to talk and swallow the news of her purity all at once.

  “Eat up before your breakfast gets cold. I don’t know if you’ll like ‘em, but they’re pancakes with bits of fresh bacon sprinkled in the batter. They’re my favorite breakfast food.” She is putting forth an effort and seems less bitchy today. I sure hope so because her mood swings were starting to give me whiplash.

  We both eat in a comfortable silence, and strangely her weird pancake concoction wins me over. Who would have ever thought of bacon in the batter? The softness of the pancake mixed with the salty bacon is like heaven dancing on my tongue.

  “I’m going to pick up this mess and then head to the stables if you want to come. I mean, I know you’re probably busy with unpacking and all, but I figured I’d ask since Dusty will be gone the majority of the day.”

  “Oh, I didn’t even notice he wasn’t here.” Of course I didn’t. Hensley’s had my full attention, well, since I got up. “Where’d he run off to so early?”

  “He tutors some local kids at the Boys and Girls Club in town.” A smile crosses her face, and I know she is deeply proud of her best friend.

  “That’s awesome. I’d actually like to get in on that if they need more volunteers.”

  Looking shocked, Hensley’s eyes widen, “You would? I didn’t picture you as the type. I mean most real cowboys around here are too busy preparing for the summer’s big rodeo.”

  My ears perk up. “Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. Y’all have a local rodeo?”

  “Yup. Mostly it’s some dumb kids we went to high school with farting around. I mean, no one has even held on longer than eight seconds, ever. So it’s not a real rodeo. Just something we put on at the county fair. Why, you interested?”

  “I may be, but I want to learn more about this volunteer thing. I have a soft spot for children.” I don’t explain myself. She isn’t ready to hear my sad story, and I’m even less ready to tell it.

  “Really, cowboy? Well, how about you help me clean up this mess and tag along with me today. I’ve got something for you to see.”

  “Sounds good.” Standing up, I stack our plates on top of one another and place them in the sink. “You wash, I’ll dry?”

  Nodding, Hensley takes a step closer to me. Her tanned arm brushes mine as she reaches to turn on the nozzle. Steam and water from the faucet run out of the spout and onto my hands that are carefully placing the dirty dishes into the sink.

  Laughing, Hensley moves the faucet head over to my side of the divided sink. “You might want to wash and I’ll dry.” Her smile stays set on her perfectly plump lips, instead of drooping into a frown. It’s nice and seems genuine. Maybe she really has turned over a new leaf.

  Once we finish putting the dishes away, Hensley looks me up and down, not even trying to hide her glance. “Do you like what you see?” I taunt. I couldn’t help it, by her facial expression she looked like she wanted to eat me.

  “Actually I don’t, if we’re being honest. Where we’re going you’re going to need to be in something a little more durable than a pair of sweats. You might wanna change.”

  After agreeing that I wouldn’t be going anywhere in my gym clothes, I go back to my room and change. Something more durable…throwing on a pair of Wrangler jeans, a white cotton T-shirt, a baseball cap, and my trusty Ariat boots, I’m ready in under three minutes. On the way out of my room I stop in front of my dresser, rub a stick of deodorant under each of my arms and spray a squirt of cologne across my chest.

  I walk back into the living room and see Hensley standing in front of a mirror applying some sort of lip balm. Her lips are so full, you’d think they could have been injected, but nope...they aren’t. I can tell she isn’t one of those prissy girls. Not like Brittani…I wouldn’t put it past her to have fake lips, or fake everything.

  Giving me a demure smile in the mirror, it seems as if the mean girl I met only yesterday has disappeared and has been replaced with a pleasanter version of herself. I don’t know what happened or why she’s had a sudden attitude change, but I’m starting to like this side of her better. I think it’s the real Hensley, the girl without the mask, the girl that I’m slowly starting to enjoy being around. But it’s only day two, and a lot can change in a summer’s time.

  I’M NOT TOO proud to admit I was acting like a pompous ass yesterday. I actually had a whole speech prepared about how sorry I was, hoping he could forgive me for being crazy and we could move forward. But as soon as I caught a glimpse of him walking down that damn hallway with messy hair and a giant smile spread across his perfect face, I became annoyed with him again. What is it about those damn dimples that renders me speechless and irritates me? I can’t put my finger on it, but it’s like being around him brings out the giddy schoolgirl in me at the same time as the raging bitch that hides in my soul. She’s just lurking around the depths of my cold heart, waiting to come out and pounce. And what do ya know? She shows her ugly, little head every time he is around.

  Truthfully, I think it’s my way of pushing him away. For some reason, yesterday, before we even had our formal introductions, there w
as something about him. The stranger staring at me from amongst the crowd, he grabbed my attention, and since that moment, he’s had it. I think it’s like the mind’s mechanism of protecting itself, but it’s more myself watching out for my heart. Maybe my brain knows something I don’t yet, or maybe I know it and just refuse to admit it. Not falling for Colby Grant is going to be my biggest fight yet. One moment I feel like it’s one I wouldn’t mind losing, and the next I’m reminded that he would be just another person tying me to this town and I can’t let that happen. I won’t get stuck here.

  We eat and then I fill him in on Dusty’s whereabouts. The strange part is he actually seems interested in what Dusty is doing and even asks if they need anyone else as a volunteer. I’ve never known a man to look so intense and overjoyed about helping others. I can’t lie, my heart did one of those annoying little fluttering thingies. Dammit. He even agreed to come with me today, before I even explained where we were going, so now we’re climbing into Betsy and heading towards the farm.

  “ARE YOU SURE you want to drive? I mean, I honestly don’t mind to.” He thumbs backwards towards his truck before he reluctantly shuts the passenger side door of my car.

  The sound of Betsy rattling on her hinges makes me chuckle and reminds me I need to have Dad put some WD40 on her. I love my car, rattling and all. “No, it’s fine. You’ve been driving for days, and you don’t know where we’re going, and I am super bad with directions. Plus your keys are inside and we’re already sitting.” Am I honestly rambling? What has gotten into me? Wait, don’t answer. I already know what and he’s sitting like six inches away.

  “You don’t seem like the kind of gal that’s bad at anything.”

  There goes that damn fluttering again. Clearing my throat, I mumble, “Trust me, the more you get to know me, the more things you’ll learn I’m bad at.”

  “Name one.” He smirks. What does he think – I’m not bad at anything? And who is he to make those kinds of assumptions about me anyhow?

  “Well, for starters, I can’t fish,” I tell him, which isn’t a lie. Dusty and my dad have taken me on one of their little trips several times. For some reason I always come back empty-handed. It’s like I’m cursed or something.

  “Wow. Now that is horrible. We might be able to rectify that situation this summer. I’m actually an expert fisherman, if I do say so myself.”

  “I’m sure ya are.” I can tell he doesn’t know what to think of my statement. Frankly, neither do I. He probably is a great fisherman, but…why are my thoughts so jumbled up when he is near?

  “Anyways, we’re here.” Turning on my right turn signal, the steady sound of Betsy’s clicking signal fills the awkward air that lingers between us. Small talk has never been something I’ve needed to be good at. Since Dusty is one of my only friends, we talk all the time. There’s never much silence when we’re around each other, so this is new territory for me. Colby and I are complete strangers; hell, I couldn’t even tell you his middle name. I foresee a lot of small talk in our future. Great.

  “You’re taking me to a farm? Do you have some point to prove? I’m a real cowboy. I’ll admit it.” He grins, but it’s fake, like he is only doing it to seem like a gentleman. I don’t speak, instead I continue to press the accelerator and drive forward. “Do you want me to rope some cattle or something? I mean, I will…if that’s what you want. But if it’s just because you don’t think I can, I won’t do it. So what’s it going to be, Sunshine?”

  Bringing him here isn’t really about him at all. I do find it funny that he assumes it’s because I don’t think he can ride a flipping horse. Putting the car into park, I point at a meadow with horses and three children all standing around wearing helmets and protective vests, and the biggest smiles I’ve ever seen. “Shut up already and look.”

  Colby looks into the field and then back at me. His expression is muddled at first, like he doesn’t quite believe where we are or that places like this exist. And then he looks…depressed? I notice his eyes gloss over before he abruptly turns his head back towards the window.

  “Welcome to Whispering Hills Therapeutic Riding Center. I work here.”

  “I thought you worked with Dusty at that burger place?”

  Unbuckling my seatbelt, I answer him, “I do, but during the summers I also work here part-time.”

  “You’re full of surprises, aren’t you?” His voice is low and unyielding, not like his normal charismatic tone. He doesn’t turn back around to face me. Instead his eyes stay locked looking out the window. I can see his reflection in the glass. He doesn’t look as cheerful as I would have hoped. I wonder why.

  We both exit the car. “Look, if this is too much, just tell me. I have a three-hour shift today, but you can take my car and I’ll grab a ride from Logan. I just figured since you are all country and shit, you might enjoy being on a farm. It might remind ya of home or something.”

  “That’s the problem. It does remind me of home.”

  Digging my boot into the gravel, my hands fidget. Not knowing what to say isn’t something I’m used to. Very seldom do I feel at a loss for words.

  “You know, Hensley,” he reaches and grabs my hand, his body now closing the distance between us. As much as I want to pull away, I don’t. “I really appreciate you being so thoughtful. This might actually be what I needed. Thank you.”

  Looking down at our interlaced fingers, my mind is yelling at me to let go, but my heart is telling me to grip his hand more tightly. Why do I feel like I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place? Like the thought of actually letting loose and being carefree, or having a little…a very tiny, innocent crush, means I’m damned to this town. There are so many things I’ve never allowed myself to experience – homecoming dances, college parties, all of the fun, normal stuff that people my age are doing. And I’m missing all that for what? A hope that one day some big time producer is going to waltz into my itty-bitty town and whisk me away right into the limelight? It hasn’t happened yet, and it may never happen, so maybe I need to think of the alternative for once. Maybe I’ll be just like my mother, stuck in this town when her heart is somewhere else.

  “Yeah, umm, you’re welcome.” Swallowing, I choose to follow this unfamiliar feeling in my gut for once and grasp his hand more tightly.

  We walk hand in hand into the building and I suddenly regret my decision to bring him here with me. Mrs. Blair is staring at Colby like he just jumped straight off the pages of a magazine. He is attractive with his American boy good looks, don’t get me wrong, but geez, she’s acting like she’s never seen a boy with dimples before.

  Approaching the big, wooden desk in the middle of the room I open my mouth to make formal introductions, “Mrs. Blair, this is Colby; Colby, this is Mrs. Blair. She and her husband own this fancy establishment, and their son, Logan, is out there with today’s kids already. You might have seen him when we drove in.”

  Colby holds out his hand in front of him, “Good morning, Mrs. Blair, this is a nice place you have here. I really appreciate you letting me tag along with Hensley today.”

  Her cheeks redden before he is even done with his sentence. “Well, honey, the pleasure is all mine. We really wish Hensley all the best, and well, by the looks of it, she’s found it in you.”

  Are you fucking kidding me?

  “How long have y’all been an item? I haven’t heard anything, so this is big news to me,” Mrs. Blair probes.

  In unison we both blurt, “We’re not dating.”

  She looks lost, and I feel like a fool.

  “I appreciate your compliments, ma’am. Will you excuse me while I find the restroom?”

  “Go straight down that hallway and take a left. The men’s room is the first door on the right, darlin’.”

  Once Colby is far enough away, I open my mouth to scold Mrs. Blair, but her hand flies up in front of my face before my lips even have time to part. “Now don’t you go pushin’ this one away, you hear me, Hensley Bradley? I don’t care what y
ou do or don’t claim, but I saw that sparkle in your eye, so don’t play me for a fool, young lady. I saw y’all holding hands. He seems like a real nice man, and that’s just what the doctor ordered for ya. Make sure he has on steel toe boots and get out there; Logan’s waiting to start. And if he gives you any trouble, make sure you let me know. I’ve told that boy time and time again, you don’t feel the same way ‘bout him.”

  Knowing there is no arguing with her, I am secretly relieved Colby had to go to the bathroom. It feels like it’s been nothing but awkward between us, and the last thing I want to do is add to the ever growing list of weirdness. Mrs. Blair salivating at the mouth like a starved animal, yeah, that’s pretty weird. And her assumptions about us dating, yeah, that’s way off too. Shaking my head, I give her a wink, letting her know I’m fine and then walk the few feet to the back door of the building. Colby is grown, and I have no doubt she’ll help him find his way out here if he gets lost. The thought makes me cringe but he is amazingly handsome. I guess it’s normal.

  NEEDING A MOMENT to regain my composure, I excuse myself to the restroom. Once inside, my hand fumbles with the lock until it latches, and I lean against the wood paneled wall. Feeling a surge of sadness rush through me, I run my hands through my hair and try to shake it off.

  There is an oval mirror hanging above the sink. Looking up, I see my reflection. My face looks pale as if I’ve seen a ghost, but I don’t know why I feel so dismayed. It’s not like she knows about me or my brother. Honestly, I’m sad more than anything. I wish we would have known about this place when Levi was with us. He would have loved it. Yes, we did our best to involve him as much as possible on our farm, but we didn’t have the tools to make him completely comfortable like it seems this place could have done. I miss him every second of every day.

  Realizing I’ve been gone for a while, I toss my wet paper towel in the garbage and walk back down the hall. Much to my surprise, Hensley is nowhere in sight.